WHEN SEPIA TURNED INTO SCARLET

UNEDITED SAMPLE LITERARY ARTICLE
By Zatia Denise Danao Gammad
IV-Madame Marie Curie


She finally said yes, the most-awaited response. The response that nearly tore me apart as it made him reach the heavens. It has been months that he confronted me for what Barbie dolls desire to accentuate their hypocritical beauty. Of course, I have to give him honest replies. He is my best friend, after all.

Gone are the days that he gave hugs as farewells. Also those midnight chats about futuristic nonsense. Maybe I could share my muffin with someone else but nobody does the wolfing down better than him. He loved my banana walnut muffins. And I would definitely miss the times when he used to make fun of me, though I really get irritated by his snorting laughs. When I was with him, everyday felt like sparks. There were fireworks everywhere. And he never cared if anyone saw us. Just as long as I was the leading lady and he was the leading man, we were good. There were no antagonists during those moments. The movie that I have always fantasized kept getting better and better. And the scene that I was always eager to rewind was the time when his eyes glittered promisingly as he breathed out the words, “You will always have me.” And I knew I did.

The movie that I was starring in was in sepia. I loved how the warmth of grayish brown represented romance perfectly. I loved how it started with two people on a bench with a pile of autumn leaves parallel to their view of serenity. As the crisp, sun-dried leaves sailed along with the calm breeze, the diffused gestures we had broke the silence. His melodious playing of the guitar at dusk complemented the inclining fervency that mingled with my fidgeting. The music amplified smoothly and so did my affection. It kind of reminded me of those old films shown in black and white. Bold colors happen to make movies strident and blinding. And I didn’t want to take my eyes off the movie. At the back of my head, I murmured those enticing words that I heard from the radio:

“I wish that I was in your arms, like a Spanish guitar. You would play me through the night ‘til the dawn.”

It was the exact translation of the involuntary heart-pounding that I was experiencing. Nevertheless, regret never entered my mind. I made him finish playing his instrument. It was truly serenading. I was in a movie where the film was fading because people maximized their time replaying it. From the moment he strummed with passion to the part where I sway with enchantment, I knew our audience gazed upon the fusion we had.

Warm rays shone as I saw magnificence in a silhouette gradually vanishing from the perfection of romance in the movie. It was the perfect ending. My leading man was the last person I wanted to see in each day that I am blessed to have. And more blessed to have him.

The movie had its last brilliance when the antagonist came along. It started to make my walls crumble as he unexpectedly found infatuation lingering with his mind. He said she was his dream girl. More like some Bratz girl out of the box.

He turned romance into rejection. This enamored leading lady started to tarnish. And this time, he himself was the one repeating the film, carelessly revising every passionate scene I’ve directed. From that moment, with his willingness, he started to blend me into the woods as a new leading lady star in my movie.

Time flew and all that he could utter was her name. As he went along describing his dream girl, I gave nothing but exasperated sighs. He loved how her hair swishes on her sheering shoulders and how she smiles gaily. How her giggles make him drawn to her nearer and nearer each day. He adored her sheepish eyes and how her eyelashes dusted away extra metallic eye shadow that fell. Her pearlescent skin stayed radiant under the sun and the rain. Her red, glossy lips made her porcelain teeth whiter. Her hour-glass body dressed with the simplicity of fashion made her irresistible to him. Most of all, her optimism that made her name engraved in his heart. The new leading lady shimmered effortlessly. And indeed she was in his limelight.

As much as I would want to change the script of my tainted movie, I know I couldn’t do so anymore. They were at the climax of the movie, the part which I have been longing to be in. The warmth of my movie has gone overboard. It was scarlet. It was piercing through my eyes as I yearn for it to stop. The problem was: I was the only one blinded by the movie, denying the impending truth. I knew it wasn’t a bad movie. In fact, it was much better than what I had directed. He strummed more passionately than before. She swayed with more enchantment. If there was more than perfection, it was the union of their silhouettes vanishing away from the orange-painted scenario. The sailing of crisp, sun-dried leaves went circles along their path, one caught between her strands of shiny hair. The ending was him gently pulling the leaf off of her hair as she gleamed beautifully at his angel-carved face. He broke the silence with words I misunderstood, “You will always have me in your heart.” He knew that everyone in the audience surely felt the vibe. Everyone except me.

It was unbearable to hear that I directed his movie. He gave me so much gratitude for making their scenes more intense, more favorable to the audience. I grew meeker each day of rolling the clips of his intimate movie. I was caressed by misery and pain as I saw the same film over and over again. The audience still felt the same intensity that glowed upon my shattered hope. The fragments reflected the intensity in distant corners, where even the most ignorant people would notice. It was impossible turned to possible. And it was all because of me.

I am his best friend. And now I am his director. I no longer am the leading lady in my movies. I am meant to make my leading man be in seventh heaven while I hit rock bottom, writing new scripts out of torment and despair. Though tears made the ink run and the paper crumpled, the story is permanent. It will never wear off. They will forever be my lead characters. And the horrid truth that I must embrace is that I will be forever part of the audience, whose purpose is to applaud and make comments about the outstanding performance they made, and to just imagine what it’ll be like in a lead role. I had no choice but to watch and not be a part of it.