UNWAVERING

UNEDITED SAMPLE LITERARY ARTICLE
By Jose Mari Hall Lanuza
IV-Enrico Fermi


How far can you go for the one you love? How sure are you that you possess an unwavering heart? That even in the face of doubt or danger, you will remain by their side? Even in the face of insanity?

He has always loved her beyond reason. She has always loved him incomparably among others. They had everything. And the most important thing of all, they had each other. Everything was simply perfect, as if it was written in stone that things should happen as they had. Picture perfect. Or so they thought.

One day, he was sent home from work because of a really nasty headache. She rushed home when she found out, worried that something might have happened to him. But she did not see this coming. She was not expecting what she saw. She saw him, but it was like he was a different person. He was curled up on the floor, staring into nothingness with the face of a man burning at the stakes. She did not know what to do. What was happening to him? “Who are you?”, she thought, finding her face wet with her tears. He did not turn around to see, as if he did not hear her violent sobs. She called up all their closest friends, asking for help. She did not have any idea what to do. The man she loved was no longer the man she knew. He was different. A stranger.

The doctors said it was stress and chronic insomnia that triggered his nervous breakdown. She, together with all of their friends, was now at a hospital. She could not believe what she was hearing. The man she loved, the man she was soon to marry, was now a stranger who cannot even recognize her. “No, this is not happening. It cannot.” But she could not even convince herself because when she looked at him, she knew otherwise. She could no longer see herself in his eyes. He was only a few meters away, but it felt like he distanced himself from her reach. He was in some unknown land, miles away from the girl crying outside his room. He did not even take notice of her. He belonged to nothingness now.

She never imagined that such a thing would happen. It has been a few months since they went to that hospital. It was getting harder each day for her, taking care of him and providing for him. There were lonely nights wherein she'd look back at the past and remember all the good times and bad times. She smiled to herself sadly as she remembered all the times wherein they would get into senseless arguments. Despite it all, she missed it. "A million of those would be better than this." she thought to herself. But she never regretted a single moment, because everything she did now, she did for him. She did not give up, because at the end of the day, she drew her strength from the only man she loved. Even if with every look into his eyes, she saw nothing. So even with tears welling up her eyes, she was happy taking care of him. It was through this way that she got over every single moment of bitterness.

“Good morning my love. Did you sleep well? Are you ok?” The only response she got was a look from him for just a second, before staring into nothingness again. Oblivion was his companion now. “I was thinking of getting a babysitter. Is that fine with you my darling?” Nothing. She suddenly started crying, her tear-stained cheeks now flowing again with tears of pain and suffering. “You know, every night I always pray and hope that someday, maybe you will come back. That someday, you will recognize me again. I really miss you, you know. When will you come back to me? Will you still return? Will I be able to feel your warmth ever again? Please tell me if you are feeling fine. I really, really miss you. Come back soon, ok? I will be waiting.”

So she waited and waited, taking care of him as if he were the most precious treasure on Earth. Each day was spent full of attention towards him. She made sure that someone was always taking care of him. Whenever she went to work, a baby sitter took her place. And whenever she went home, she gave him all the attention a person could ever want. Even if he did not notice a single thing. She almost had no sleep each day. All she had in mind was taking care of him. That was all she ever wanted to do, and that is the only thing she wished to do. He had everything, but he did not even know. To him, nothingness was everything.

“Good morning my love. How are you today? Do you know me now?” She sat beside him, caressing his hair as she spoke with tears in her eyes. “Is today the day? When will it be my love?” Nothing. “Just remember that I will always be here. I will never leave you. No matter how much it hurts seeing us this way, I will still be here. Please just know that.” Suddenly, he looked at her, and for a moment it seemed as if she saw herself in his eyes.

“Hello, lady.”

Suddenly he leaned on her shoulder, staring again into nothingness.

She held his face with her hands wet from her tears, and gave him a kiss. All the love that used to be only a memory now came back, even for just a second.

“My heart is unwavering. My love is only yours. Even if you cannot see me, I will take care of you. Count on me to always protect the world that you now live in. Always…”