TOY SOLDIERS

UNEDITED SAMPLE LITERARY ARTICLE
By Christine Joy Ombania de Asis
IV - Madame Marie Curie


You would always place the pillow right between us as we sat on the mattress, Mom must be very angry for we were not yet asleep, but I always thought that she was just only ignoring our mischief and giving us the freedom to wallow in the glee of our childhood. Dad would then come back home after a long day of stress and hard work; we would rush excitedly into the front door and kiss him, leaving the pillow behind along with the cute, tiny, green toy soldiers that we used to collect and marvel at. The pillow was the board of our simple game, a game we invented and created, a game that did not even have a name and fixed rules, only toy soldiers.

We used to play this every night before we went to sleep. When Ate and Charmaine were already in the midst of their dreams, we were still up, giggling and laughing as our toy soldiers stumbled and lurched into hilarity and enjoyment. You had your own base and I had mine, and I would always get annoyed whenever you would win over and capture my helpless little toy soldiers. Our parents would only watch the late night TV shows, and dad would always buy our all time favorite midnight snack at Kuya Randy’s house. We used to eat and play all night long; we never got tired and sleepy. We were very happy and contented back then, and I wished that the night would never end.

But toy soldiers would always be toy soldiers. No matter what we do, they were just small, synthetic, childish playthings that rotted as we aged through time. We were so depressed when each one of them eventually vanished behind our consciousness; then with just a blink of an eye, they all disappeared and finally ceased existence. Then, came along the Play Station, our agonies were replaced by the rush of excitement lingering through our veins. Two days, three weeks, four months, we were still very much indulged in the puddle of thrill and exhilaration brought about by the latest breakthrough in gaming technology. And just like before, we still played all night and even stayed up until dawn. But, mom now would scold and nag us to get to bed. Perhaps, we were not allowed to wallow in the glee of our childhood anymore, for we were children no longer.

Things really have changed. Not only our body as they matured through the fast phase of time, neither the game we played nor the manner we played the game, not even mom’s attitude toward our evening routine, but you as well. Now, I come to realize that when something comes, something must go. I was so dispirited by the fact that I had to say goodbye to our small innocent bodies that were easily satisfied by a pillow and a midnight snack bought from Kuya Randy’s house. To our game that had no name nor fixed rules. To our lenient mom who was just ignoring our mischief and giving us the freedom to wallow in the glee of our childhood. To our toy soldiers that stumbled and lurched into hilarity and enjoyment. Toy soldiers that once shared our giggles and laughter, bonding us together even more. However, I guess that bond wasn’t that strong as I had thought, for it was readily shattered by just an inch thick, square open-close box. You became very obsessed and so much protective to your new friend; you would not even let me play with you anymore. You started bragging about getting up late even though you were the one who was obviously doing it. You started shouting at me whenever I unintentionally forgot the adaptor unplugged. Now I wonder, if I intentionally stepped on our toy soldiers, would you get mad at me? Would you shout at me too like how you shouted at me when I almost wrecked your “new companion?” Or perhaps you just didn’t care, or you could not just remember. You were so different, apart form the person I knew and played toy soldiers with. I missed my best friend.

You had your own base, and I had mine. But we were not playing on a pillow anymore, but on the real board of life. No more toy soldiers to protect and defend our territories, we ourselves are the warriors of this battlefield. You were graduating in high school and so did I in elementary. You had your girlfriend, and I had my girl friends. We became so busy and loaded, we did not have time to play and bond with each other. There was even a time that I felt that you existed, but not living enough for me to feel your presence. I searched for you in the form of another person, but I failed. I just sat down on the corner and I cried, but nobody understood the sentiments I was going through. They just passed me by as I took into comprehension that all the while I thought my life was reeling into a pool of extreme joy and happiness. There was still something that was lacking after all.

I know others may think of this as very childish and shallow, but what had happened to me left me a lesson of a lifetime. Now, whenever I look at toy soldiers, I just look at my happy childhood. Lost, broken or phased out, still the memories they brought to my life continue to pierce and penetrate through my heart and mind, making me enjoy and treasure the pain. When something comes, something must go, but its memory lives on. At this moment, I look at life very differently. I don’t expect the characters in my story to stay; there will come a time that I will turn the pages into another chapter, and I’ll say goodbye to them as I say hello to the new ones. But their parts I will never forget, for my story would not be completed without them. I don’t bury myself under that; I am just happy and contented that you are still here, ready to giggle and laugh at me anytime, but on a different way. I just hope we will still have a chance to spend our time not with a child’s mind, but with a child’s heart, like playing toy soldiers.