LETTING GO

UNEDITED SAMPLE LITERARY ARTICLE
By Therese Romaine Nalangan Rustia
IV - Michael Faraday


I’ve read the letter. Thank you so much for everything… for having you in my life, for forgiving and understanding me all this time… I’m really sorry for all my mistakes and shortcomings…I’ll always treasure our memories. Sorry for always forcing what I want and being insensitive to your feelings… You are my first love and the happiest days of my life were the ones I spent with you… God bless… I love you very much.

These were the final words you said before we finally parted ways. It felt so surreal. I still couldn’t believe it was officially over. But it really is. I let you go. You accepted it.

It’s for the best, isn’t it?

I could remember the very first time I saw you. It was during the interview of the applicants who would like to study in Makati Science High School. Students were given numbers to find out who would be interviewed next. My number was 30 and yours was 31. We sat beside each other and I remembered myself looking at your report card. At that very moment, I knew that I had a crush on you.

When I finally knew who you were, I felt admiration because you were a very intelligent person. We got introduced to one another through a friend of yours. Then, on your birthday, even though I felt so shy, I greeted you. Even though we weren’t close, I was happy just by the thought of seeing you.

It was almost the end of my 1st year in high school when people started telling me that you admired me too. I was quite surprised because I knew that you liked somebody else. During that time, I didn’t have a crush on you anymore. But my feelings resurfaced when you started to make small moves. Your simple glances towards me were enough to make me kilig.

At the beginning of 2nd year, your friends started to approach me. They were asking me if you had a chance in my heart. And I told them that everyone has this chance.

Everything started when you finally found the courage to say hello. Then it continued with chats in the internet, text messages, phone calls, and then simple conversations face to face. I knew we both felt nervous the first time but we tried to keep it casual as much as possible.

On my birthday, I was quite surprised to receive a gift from you. I wasn’t expecting it but I also felt overwhelmed when I found out that you gave me a Garfield stuffed toy. I really liked it because my mom told me that my dad’s first gift to her was the same stuffed toy.

Then on Christmas, I gave you a pillow in the shape of a bone. Your classmates always teased you that you looked like a dog and I thought that that pillow would suit you.

I received another stuffed toy from you with a few roses and a letter. I really appreciated your effort because even without the roses, whatever you would have given to me would be alright. But the fact that you tried to find a way to give me those roses was more than enough to make my heart feel so touched.

Summer passed by like a breeze and school started once again. Things were different now because you began courting me officially.

On your birthday, you patiently waited for me because I had to attend a meeting for the school paper. When we finally saw each other, I was surprised to see you holding a beautiful bouquet of roses and with it a small cake and coffee from Starbucks. Then, at that very moment, you finally said the three words. I love you. It was a very meaningful moment for me. But everyday spent with you was always meaningful wasn’t it?

During those times, I guessed I already felt the same way but I couldn’t quite know for sure. My heart was very unpredictable and it didn’t know what it really felt. Somehow, I didn’t know if I really loved you already so I chose to keep silent.

Time flew. Days passed.

Mahal na mahal kita. You said. I love you too. I replied.

I remember the times when you look at me, the times when you say hello to me shyly, the times when we talked over the phone, the times when you comforted me, the times you made me smile, the times you made me feel special, and most of all, the times that you made me feel so loved.

These are the things I remember when I think of you. I remember them because they were happy memories that I had of you. They were the things that kept me smiling, the things that kept me from thinking of the pain you caused me.

Our love wasn’t always blissful. Many things have happened. Tears were shed and the trust that was once built on a strong foundation crushed into a million pieces. But I chose not to ponder over it.

I choose to leave that part out because I only wanted to think of the good things whenever I think of you. I didn’t want to dwell on the things that you’ve done to hurt me. It was painful and I would never forget it, but I have already forgiven you. I loved you, and I loved you dearly, truly, honestly.

They say that when you truly love someone, you let them go. So that’s what I did. I let you go because I knew that by doing so, things wouldn’t be so difficult anymore. I knew that you loved me. But you loved someone else too. That wasn’t hidden from me. I knew it from the time the incident took place. It hurts but I have to learn to accept the truth.

You were my first love too. And you’ve made my life happy in so many ways. I am glad that you and I have crossed paths. You are already a part of my life. A portion of my heart will always have you in it. And that will never change.

Now, I can say that I’ve finally moved on with my life. I don’t mind seeing you with her. I don’t feel any bitterness because there is nothing to be bitter about.
I am happy with my life right now. And I know that you are too.

But that’s what love is all about. You love, you get hurt, and then you love again. It is just another opportunity to give love to someone else. As for me, I’ve learned that in love, we shouldn’t look at the bad things but instead look at the things that mattered most.

It doesn’t always end with a ‘happily ever after’ but somewhere, someday, at the right place and at the right time, you’ll find the one true person you’ll spend your whole life with.